The Human and Social Aspect

I have come across all sorts of NRIs in the US. But the vast species of our countrymen that you can find is overwhelming.

Where should I start from??

OK. Lets begin by saying that people do not have respect for your time, and your privacy, and your space. But yeah.......they can admire your body(if you are a woman or bear any resemblance to one) from head to toe in just one glance.

Right from electrician, maids, plumber, etc. to your very well educated and cultured friends and relatives, no one cares for your time. Both me and H have grown up in families where everything was done by the clock's tick. Very disciplined families(in fact too much disciplined). Now when some one comes late then the scheduled (late by 30-150 mnts.)time, I am sure the most-undisciplined ones will also lose their cool.
Friends who are suppossed to meet us at 6pm, turn up at 8:15-8:30. Then they got to prepare Raagi for their child(15 mnts), feed him/her(30 mnts). wash utensils and baby(15 mnts). Now they are ready to step out for the planned dinner at 9:30. Because only their child was hungry. Our's lives on air. Without even realizing that we have been waiting and our child is also starving since 8:00 PM, they move as per their convenience.

Just because I am a stay at home mom, the maid does not respect my time. She says, "aap to ghar pe hi ho na. aapko kidhar jaana hai!"(you are at home all the time.why do you need me to come early). Yeah I don't deserve timeliness.

Free advice is another huge turn off. Some random Auntie ji in the mall will comment on how you should put some warm clothing on your child as it is cold now.
I used to bottle feed A when she was a baby for social gatherings. Logic- If we went to meet someone for 1-2 hour, why should I spend 1 hour inside a locked room breast feeding?But looking at that, Auntie Ji said- tum apna doodh nahi pilati?aaya nahi ya diya hi nahi? kam se kam 1 saal to pilana hi chahiye. (Don't you breast feed the baby?Didn't you get any milk or you opted not to breast feed?you should feed for at least the first 1 year). Also, Why I should not give pacifier, why she must not wear this and that, why is she not potty trained at 2, why is she still drinking from bottle at 18 months. The best seller- when are you having the second one? Do to hone hi chahiye(2 kids are a must). Shut up...will you please......I wish I could say this.

Some very dear friends have flooded me with a mountain high pile of free advices. These are the guys who R2I-ed before us and have now settled down- what to do, how to do and they get upset if you don't do the way they have advised. Not that I care but it bugs. Useless blabbering all the time when you know the whats and hows better then them. Excuse me....I was born Here....I spent 25 years of my life here. I know how to treat common cold, tackle maids, how many leaves to give to maids, how to haggle, etc.etc.etc.

Another thing I hate about Bangalore(My knowledge of south is limited to B'lore) is that people-male or female, youngsters, oldies, middle aged, everyone will touch the child's face and take the hand to their mouth and kiss it. They don't have any ill-will. I know that. But it annoys the child, it looks and feels gross and most importantly, WHY???


But as I said, if it is your body....oh lala! your body is wonderland!
You get all due respect in terms of attention and stare. Even if you are very average looking, big, fat, dark, 30 something......you will be dissected. Not just by men but women too. I don't know what they are looking at.

Of all the things, if the human factor is changed in India- quantity reduced and quality improved, it is the best place to live in.